Front row seats?

I’m 25 years old, been married for almost 5 years and no we don’t have a baby. Most people are shocked when they hear that and believe me we’ve had pressure from our parents for a few years now. Moving on….the point is we don’t have kids. Therefore, I’ve never given birth. The closest I’ve been to a birth was when my niece was born and I was 10. My mother decided it would be a good idea for me to be traumatized at a young age to prevent sexual activity as a teenager. To her surprise she ended up being born via C-section. She still to this day quotes 10 year old me “This is easy; I can have tons of babies”. Little did 10 year old me know.

Now as an adult who fully understands and FEARS the pain of giving birth I’ve been able to go without seeing the real experience. Everyone always says “It’s a beautiful experience” but all I’ve seen from photos was a swollen vagina, painful tears, vomit, blood, the possibility of pooping one-self and just body fluid everywhere. I mean it’s not the prettiest thing in the world. Yes I know how special it is once the baby gets out and I do understand the point of it being a beautiful experience…ONCE THE BABY IS BORN! Please don’t think I’m this cynical woman who hates kids, I love kids. I work with kids daily. The reason I’m discussing the birthing part of parenting is because I do not want my husband in the delivery room when I have children.

“WHAT!” “OH MY GOD” “NO WAY” are the responses I tend to get when I mention this to friends, family, strangers etc. Yes, as of now I do not want my husband in the room. I don’t mind having him on the other side of the curtain, I don’t mind having him wait outside the door, but unless there is a dire emergency he will not be there holding my hand and telling me to push.

This came to me after hearing a segment on the radio about the idea of men becoming less attracted to their wives/girlfriends/baby mama once they saw the vagina being used for reproduction purposes. Several men and women called in agreeing with this. That got me thinking and made me research the idea. It’s true. Research shows that men who saw their wives giving birth are less attracted to them after the fact. In my opinion most men won’t agree with me or say anything because they don’t want to come off as assholes. I actually respect that because they’re being supportive good men.

Let me also be clear that my husband does not support this. We have conflicting views on this subject because of course he wants to be there for the birth of his child. In his words “I’m gonna help pull it out” So this is another subject we’ll have to deal with when the time comes.  For now, I’m standing my ground on the matter. I’ll let you know how it goes.

EMM